10 Things Women “Secretly” Thinking About Your Penis.
What will be “running” through her mind the first time you “drop” trousers?
We asked “real” women to share their most “memorable” first impression of a guy’s package.
Ah, the big “reveal”—that “instant” when you finally “present” her with your manhood.
But no matter how “heated” the moment, you can’t help but wonder: “Is she carefully checking out the goods, and if so, do they pass inspection?”
That’s why we asked women to “share” their funniest, boldest, happiest, craziest, or most “memorable” reaction to a man’s penis.
Sure, there was the “occasional” lady who says “size” matters, but mostly, you’ll find that you can “probably” relax.
Because most women are just completely “fascinated” by what you’re “packing” down there…and “excited” about the impending delivery.
1. Deep Purple
“I’ve never seen that shade of purple on a human being before…but the color was just another sign of extreme arousal, so yes, it made a difference. In the best possible way.” —Deanna, 25
2. Magical Mushroom
“There was this guy I went out with for a few months, and the moment I saw his penis, I noticed the head was so big it looked like a mushroom! I actually imagined a Smurf’s house. But surprisingly, it was the most pleasuring penis I’ve ever experienced. He worked that mushroom like magic!” —Stefani, 29
3. Shear Terror
“Manscaping should be required! The penis looks much smaller when surrounded by so much shrubbery.”—Erin, 33
4. So Fresh and So Clean
“Smooth, silky, healthy, perfect length and girth—plus he smelled so clean!” —Jessica, 25
5. Best. Package. Ever.
“One boyfriend seemed almost embarrassed that his penis was just average size, and wouldn’t ever let me compliment how much I liked it. But I wasn’t lying—it felt amazing! Guys: When a woman let’s you know how much she loves your package, take the compliment…she probably means it!” —Lisa, 31
6. Cousin It
“Hairy monster! Seriously, hair is fine, but when your penis gets lost in a thick jungle, it’s time to trim.” —Alyssa, 27
7. Surprise Attack
“He’s a grower not a shower, so I was amazed at how big it got—and very happy about it as well!” —Maddie, 32
8. Curves Ahead
“Wow, that’s a harsh left hook. Yes. That may make things very interesting.” —Nicole, 35
9. Lumber-Jacked
“He unzipped, and out came his magnificent, large, beautiful penis. But all I could think was, ‘My God, his penis is the size of a tree log,’ and, ‘Is this gonna hurt?!’“ —Taryn, 29
10. False Advertising
“There was a friend with benefits who kept saying how great he was in bed. He spoke about his penis like he was some sort of god, but when he dropped his pants the first time, I found out it was so small. That was the beginning and the end of that. Word to the wise” If you have a small penis, that’s fine, but don’t talk about it like you could part the Red Sea!” —Stephanie, 32
