Like American elections, critics of the North Korean regime have for years stated that the nation’s election process is riddled with fraud. But the people living under Kim Jong-un and Joe Biden can now feel relieved. After a thorough investigation, the FBI can confirm that there has never been evidence of voter fraud in Pyongyang or Washington.
A crack team of FBI agents browsed through all the files on their desks but no evidence of voter fraud was found. An FBI cyber-operations specialist spent the entire week browsing through all the files on his hard drive and windows folders before concluding that the allegations were baseless.
We can safely report according to Attorney General Bill Barr: “all claims of North Korean or American voter fraud are pure conspiracy theory.”
In collaboration with tech wizards the FBI has come up with a new aid in their relentless quest to uncover all instances of voter fraud. The new “Fraud Detection Goggles” will help these tireless “inquisitors of justice” to be even more effective in detecting and preventing voter fraud.
In a press release, an FBI spokesperson clarified the need for this new tool. “The wall penetrating laser-goggles we used during the Russia Collusion Coup, were a bit too sensitive. So we had to come up with something more suited to the task.”
These new hi-tech “crime detection goggles” will soon be used by all police forces in the country to sniff out American election thefts, left wing street violence, black-on-black killings and secret dealings with the communist party of China.
Meanwhile, Attorney General Bill Barr continues to hide his head in the sand and say there is no evidence of voter fraud.
The West is safe according to attorney general William Barr!